Thursday, October 19, 2006

i'm not usually this cranky

Dear Random Man walking in front of me today,

Whilst umbrellas are indeed a neccessary accessory these days, please watch where you swing it. It is NOT appropriate to swing it everywhich way thus making it difficult for people behind you (such as myself) to walk safely to their destinations. If you were taller, it may have been a little less precarious but as your "umbrella hight" was roughly the height of my midsection, the umbrella flying "akimbo" as it were, was NOT appreciated.

And NO, this is not the same as my tendancy to swing my arms further back than neccessary.

Sincerely,
Cranky pants crankerson

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Dear Advertising Exec. for Captain Morgan's Rum,

Do you realize how homoerotic your "what happens below deck stays below deck" billboard sounds? I mean if I know anything about pirates, and I think I do, it is that it was bad luck to bring a woman on board and that pirates are men. You do the math.
I most certainly have no problem with a homoerotic advertizing campaign in fact, if done well, one could reach a very important and often ignored demographic. I do however have a problem with the images of dirty pirates that run through my head anytime I see that billboard.

Sincerely,
Didn't need to know that all pirates are on the down-low

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In other news...I've been thinking a lot about my problem with forgiveness. I don't think I do it well.
I haven't forgiven my grade 8 math teacher for calling me a liar (he did this in 1993) nor have I forgiven my grade 9 french teacher for telling me that he was disappointed in me for choosing a "soft" degree such as psychology over something much better such as science, engineering or math (this happened in 2003 or 2004).
I also find that I don't forgive others for hurting the people that I care about. In fact, I probably hold those things against them more than do the people that were actually hurt. That isn't really a good thing.

And so, my goal for this year is to learn forgiveness. To start, I will forgive umbrella man for his inconsiderate umbrella waving....hey, I feel better already.

9 comments:

--Nathan-- said...

yeah i have to say that ALL girls swing their arms farther back than they should.

oh, and pirates really love their sea men!

Devo said...

Nathan, is BJ school taugth by pirates?

Kris said...

That sounds like a good start (and I'm not referring to anything below deck.)

Joy & Darrin said...

I'm liking the pirate theme.

I too am an arm over-swinger so I tend to just grab my purse strap or place my hands in my pockets. Walking with a stroller has helped my problem significantly. Darrin is an arm no-swinger so is looking like your in a giant hurry any worse than looking like a neadrathal??
Maybe the umbrella man is an arm-overswinger looking for a way to control it?

Heather said...

I dont' forgive very well either when it comes to hurting people around me. I haven't forgiven either of my two friends boyfriends even though they both did, kind of.

I sometimes forgive too easily though, which doesn't really make sense. I don't know.

Evey said...

I don't think I am an over arm swinger, then again though maybe I am and I have just never really noticed....hmmmmmmm.

I know what you mean about umbrella man I encounter that often when it rains since I am out walking all the time with dogs. It is rather annoying and I am not sure I have forgiven any of my crazy umbrella swingers.

thephoenixnyc said...

His umbrellla was around yoru mid-section? Was he a pygmy?

Erin said...

You would think in a country like England where it is raining all the time the "people" here would have perfected umbrella etiquette, but NO! Just as in the supermarket people seem to have no qualms about walking directly into/through me as though I didn't exist (apparently "excuse me" is not in the Queen's English dictionary), people on the street are clearly oblivious to the fact that there are others also walking on the street, and that if they do not raise or tip their umbrella it might clip someone in the head or even another person's umbrella. Wankers.

K said...

erin, excellent use of wankers. this lack of etiquette is simply bollocks...(did i use that right?)